Musician Tip #5: What I Am Is What I Am...

...are you what you are, or what?

I am a musician. Like all other human beings, musicians come in all shapes and sizes, colors, personalities, tax brackets, and varying degrees of personal hygiene. The constants are a desire to create and possessing the tools of the trade.

If you're a vocalist, your tool is your voice, and you can take your pipes wherever you may roam. The huge upside - they're FREE! But for those of you who either aren't vocalists or lack the rousing, musical bodily functions my grandfather was blessed with, your tool is an external musical instrument. Elementary? Nay, my good sir.

I am astounded by how often I'm approached by well-intentioned attendees at my shows who stumble through a dialog similar to the following:

DUDE: "Great set man - are you looking for a guitarist?"

ME: "Well, I'm always interested to know other musicians. You play guitar?"

DUDE: "Yeah! I love guitar, man. I'm looking for a band to play with, and I think I'd be the perfect guitarist for your songs. I'm thinking about buying this awesome Les Paul at Staff Infection Music."

ME: "So what guitar are you playing now?"

DUDE: "I don't have one. I USED to have this killer Fender Stratocaster that was built by the Archangel Gabriel and given to Jimi Hendrix before he sold it to my dad, but I had to pawn it. It's been a bummer not playing at all for the past 5 years."

ME: (thinking: "You are not a musician. ...and you are a liar. Everybody knows St. Peter built Jimi's guitar.")

Ever have a mechanic shop ask you to bring some tools along so they can fix your car? How about a professional photographer that hasn't owned a camera in the past 3 years? Even beyond those things, music is an art form that sustains musicians - you survive off of it. A drummer I knew who moved into an apartment with thin walls taught himself to play guitar to avoid the constant threats of eviction over the noisy drum kit. Why? He was a musician and was going insane without the cathartic outlet music provided (he kinda went insane anyway, but that's unrelated).

The quality of the tool doesn't even necessarily affect the situation. Some songs that changed the course of popular music were written on department store trinkets. But without at least some sort of instrument to utilize, you are a hobbyist at best and as such shouldn't go around advertising yourself as the next Clapton in the making.

Writers write. Painters paint. Architects design. Actors vote democratic and sleep around a lot. These creations begin within us, but at some point require a physical tool to help communicate the vision to the rest of the world.

Choose your weapon.